A Rose in Bloom

Its in the past let it go, why cant the bitch let it go.
we cant trust them I know that.

I feel bad for Vincent an Brian but this part wasn't my fault.
I do hope they will both be alright.
I cant be trained by him any more. He didn't ask her.

But My roses are planted. They will start to bloom I'm sure he wont let them die.
I'm planted. I'm taking bits an pieces from every one. Fiona, Brian Ace sally. Vincent an Cassandra. As well as Niko. who reminded me were family.
They all have watered me with information rules laws posture silence.

From everything they have said an taught I must be able to bloom in to a beautiful rose.
With thorns because what is a rose with out thorns to protect it.

I must learn I have been learning he locked me away for a whole day nothing no one. He was doing it to prove a point he was doing it to punish me. to show me just how much control he dose have over my every lasting life.

I was good last night i bit my tongue when the bitch lied when the bitch didn't know anything.
I must watch this Jerrard guy his composer even tho I could see he didn't like her questioning. He some how stood tall proud an even tossed her back down. Some one finely tossing her down. I have to learn I have to watch from all my fellow Ventrue
Silence is one thing. Being able to keep composure in a conversation when I may not agree with it thats my next step.

Watch listen learn

An this rose will bloom

up, down. 1 2 3 how deep is this hole?

so where do we start this time?
Ok back to the frenzying Fiona. That sounds good to me.
All I wanted was for her so stop hurting him.
Yes it was stupid what I said to her, I do think I did learn that. It was Bit right in to my chest. Right don't piss her off, or hell how bout the rest her family.
**shivers** alright so that really sucked I messed up yep an I sure paid for it more then just the pain shes left me with.

Im summoned were both summoned, now ive done it I think its my death day again. That man chopped Michaels legs off. what would he do to me. I wanted to bolt for that door as we walked in. But I composed my self.
Come on Katie walk in there maybe you wont die maybe he'll only take a limb..ohh not my legs I couldn't dance...
So many thoughts in less them a second

I pull my self to the table so slowly. glad i had Fiona's wounds to slow me down. one wrong move to that door an ited be heads off for me. There in charge. No way can you run from them.
Sit down Katie just take this like a good bitch.

I listened i heard an I was shocked. My fangs? Looking up to him I couldn't help but bite down. it was reflex. I did open up for him tho. would I really sit there him over me an try to fight him? Wouldn't that be the stupidest thing ever?

I let him use the knife he popped them out poof no more fangs. it hurt like a mother ahhh. *shivers* that guy is really scary.

Alright well Brian lost his an alot nicer manor to but he was trying to teach me something. I did learn it I did but then, well Brian asked me to leave i did gracefully respectfully to both sally an her grace.
I had nothing but respect an didn't say a word besides my parting.

Well this evening well what do I find? Well look there some one else trying to push you deeper in the hole.
some one saying something that was a complete lie.

The harpy of our city who already seems to have so many enemies so many say don't pay any mind to her, that she never tells the full truth, loves to use words twist them to fit her story. They say she has no merits so why do i get stupid an reply to her trash.

Because she says I was disrespectful to SALLY, the 2ed highest in our city the one who cut Michaels legs off???????? IS SHE FUCKING NUTS???????

Would i be walking if i had disrespected him there after what he just did??? After what I know he has done what he is capable
of. How many times have I heard it don't fuck with him. I'm not some stupid bitch I wouldn't dare that. it would be suicide for me an Brian.

So im dumb an respond to the trash
Ok calling her a lier fine fuck it I was wrong. But thee bitch did lie an I will always believe I was in the right with this one an I don't care who believes the Harpy shes just reporting trash.

I hold my head high an ignore her trash I will pull us both out of this hole an not let her or the other who strikes a cord with me trick me any more. they will fail an I will laugh when they do. I will forever an always know who not to trust not to speak to or around. My words will always be twisted. by the biased of harpy



I will pull Brian back out of this hole some how he will get his position back he must.
I hate how i feel for him now. how dare he take that from me.. but im also feeling more an more like those who dare wish him pain will have to go though my blade now. I cant stop the feelings in my head hes even or more then ace now... how can that be. I love Ace I want to make this work I dont want to be pulled to Brian ... NO i wont let it happen.

I do hate you Brian but I also love you it hurts so much an I hated saying it to you it just felt like it would hurt you an me both the first thing I could think to stab at your heart. with out getting killed for bringing Fiona in it. I wont do that again.
I am sorry for everything I don't know what to do I keep crawling up out this hole an get pushed right back in...

Ace will you still love me will you even want me now that im fully bonded to him?

I have alot on my list I must fix any of the mess ups involving Brian. some how I cant let him hurt because of me.

Party crashers

Alright I wrote one with my feelings now hers one to rant. (an funny)

HOW DARE THEY MESS UP HIS PARTY
I can't believe how much we had put in to getting that damn party ready.
Having Fiona make me get him there.
Not an Easy task how long. an hour to get him in the damn car.

"I cant I'm waiting for Fiona's call"
*Slaps Brian* wake up man follow me an get in the damn car an maybe you will get your dear Fiona now move it bud

God couldn't he make that easy on me NO
an then then we finely get there an those ASS"S have the BALLS to come on his speaker of HIS party an demand something an BOOOOM the part is CRASHED

Every one running around missions being handed out an the party stopped

No they couldn't just wait.

How dare they an I got sent home an I finely came back an then I ended up leaving that party alone because my escort had to run an help with these demands...HOW DARE THEY

Going mad, moving Fast??

I felt like i was going to go mad.
What they did. how was I going to react.
Do I acutely understand why? Do I acutely see straight.

Can I stay this way unblinded, can I fall in to line.
Be what he expects? Laugh with a fake laugh at everything an anything?
I like Fiona I do, but what if she is hurting him wouldn't lucky be so lucky?
who else. do I even want to know do I dare believe my first fear i saw. he told me no forget it she wasn't stay out of it.
How can I?

Then then Oh you came, I swear only in a dream did I think you would come. This this new life. this was the secret this was why you ran. I understand everything now. the secrets. Every ones got a secret but now I'm a part of your's apart of this world. This night life.

You came at the best time, you will help me I will be good. I must for every thing I love. My family all of them. Fiona Niko Brian Ace Victoria, every one everything I am now. I must bite my tongue sit here nod smile put on the fake emotions even if I don't want to I must learn to play a perfect piece at this game of chess

Am I going mad am I moving to fast, or is it just I am understanding this world of ours this Family of mine. Lovers, friends some one to spending time with when alone in this world. Is that all Fiona looks for. affection? Thats the same as me maybe they wont hate that me an Ace want to be together even so fast. We did have our past wants an desires.. the only thing that kept me from his arms was his secret..
This secret that I now am a part of.
This world.

So no i'm not going mad. I'm learning
am I moving to fast? Again No I am just catching up.

This aint a fairy tale

Well I guess nothing can last forever even when you are suppose to live forever hu?
I had to let him go. I know I cant fight this. He has to leave. Who can blame him with the hell Sadira put him though. I'm so sorry Michael I did love you I felt it. You were breaking though this thick skin of mine. I do hope you can get better an survive with out to much more trouble.

I Have to be strong an not fight cant lose my cool all over you or what they did to you.
I was just a stupid girl.
Please be safe live life to the fullest an thank you for the best 2 weeks I could of asked for. I don't care what trouble we got in to it was fun an thank you.
I don't blame you but this song just fits us so well

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you sweep off her feet,
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you
And your white horse, to come around

I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale
I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well
This is a big world, that was a small town
There in my rearview mirror disappearing now

Valentines Night-walk on the beach

Valentines Night to my surprises.
(part one)
We took a walk on the beach.
We looked out on to the big blue sea.
We smiled an talked an seemed to be in peace filled moment.
You complemented me you made me smile. I liked that.
Resting my head on your shoulder as we watched that which we both like.

Then she popped up. How long was she watching listening to us.
Can you be with two? Can You fall for two her an me?
Is it possible. what about me. can I fall for two is it right?
Is it what we must all do to not want to kill each other.

(part two)
I Am. We are laying on the beach looking up to the velvet sky with the sparkling stars an the speechless moon.
They do not judge us, they smile down. As the Waves crash agents the shore it reminds me so much of home.
I wish there were away to make you pick me but thats not my job follow your heart.
You give me the gift, I treasure them I will always wear them.
Dose this mean you pick me? I know they are special

(part three)
don't cry, it will be alright. I will try not to hurt you an I will try to be here for you when ever you need.

I will always be there to help you.
(like I did )
All you have to do is ask.
( like you did)

Valentines Night-walk on the beach

It all started with a walk on the beach.

new life-2weeks beyond.

I remember when you taught me to hold a blade.
The daggers you placed in my tiny little hands, I didn't notice then how pale you were. I didn't put together all the clues of the life you lived. The allergy to the sun...
The lies...the truth's what was there.

You were training me to be this way weren't you.
The Classes you forced me to go to. Everything was for this moment.

I remember what I was told. It was easier then. I didn't have the taste of death, I didn't look any where I wasn't suppose to. I kept my eyes closed.
Like the good little girl I was. every one thought I was so pure...
that i would take the abuse longer..
Pain is pleasure ...right?

I was blind an mute as I was suppose to be.
I must be again.
I do not mean to be so dumb I do not mean to speak like this.

But I am not the same little girl you raised.

I have changed you do not know everything about me any more.

I am trying an must try harder not to screw up.

This new life-1 week old

This new life has been interesting.

It has only been a week.

Most of the time it is all right.

Being kept so close. I understand his fears.

But I just want to play experience what I can with this new life.

My past is past I can’t ever go back to it.

This new me, she’s  got to relax.

Have more fun but keep the elegant beauty from my past.

I have met a few here who seem like they may help this new me,

 learn this new life.

Id call them friends.

Kathrine Scarlet Rose Boru